I scattered your ashes as you requested
on horseback
horse galloping in clapping rhythms
and with the free behind me
you asked for one verse of song
with all the love I could muster in my lungs
amazing grace
how sweet the sound
I sang loud enough for the wind to catch it and push it around
in hopes that along with it
it would take this pain u requested me not to feel
please save a wretch like you
like me
maybe i’ll tell myself you’re there in the violet hushes of the sunset
or that you’re watching behind the blinding heat of the sun
and that i hadn’t done what i had done
you hung on long enough for me to say the miscellaneous things
we held hands and glances before u let go of the world and me
you requested i make sure i never leave you to the shadows of misery
that i finish things when u grew weak
you didn’t want to hear and not see
or stare at mute things
or wobble without direction
or ache endlessly
and i promised but now this promise feels like murder to me
and i wish i would’ve thought to ask you to send peace
and mercy when you reach the King
now i’m on horse whose galloping
your ashes dancing in the wind ascending
the free behind as you requested of me
and a verse of song
amazing grace
please make a sound
