open letter to the god of starving dogs

and it’s not that
i want to see you bleed
it’s that i want to be the one
who makes the wound

do you see how power
differs from action?

do you believe in addictions
other than your own?

we are all
so fucking desperate

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war, everywhere

this man who writes
to tell me what
he’s sacrificed for his art

these children
who weren’t even born when
the land mines were planted

their missing limbs and
ruined faces
and small painful deaths

all of the reasons i
hate what i’ve become

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parable

or these animals in
their tiny cages
and the way they go insane

the way money
exchanges hands

twenty bucks he says
as his girlfriend walks into the room
and i think i might know her

i think i may have
been here before

was promised nothing but
came back again

again

learned finally that
hatred was
the only drug i needed
to feel alive

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responding to the critics

and sometimes
they write to talk about
discipline
and sometimes to lecture
about the need for
hope

sometimes
i send them pictures
of nuns hanging raped and
murdered from the trees
of central america

we all need to
believe in something

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the age of myths, deconstructed: notes on self

i.

the bleeding horse

who is everyone
and no one

who knew pollock
and picasso

who died in ’56
and again in ’63 and
again in the summer of ’97

who lives

stumbles blindly down
all of the empty streets i’ve
ever lived on

crawls crippled through
broken glass alleys

through november fields
in upstate new york with a
crucifix carved into his
soft belly and his
eyes gouged out

who is pain and
the lack of hope in
a sunlit world

things that matter
whether you
talk about them or not

ii.

the burning girl

says she loves you
as she’s dragged through

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in the age of unanswerable questions

or what about this?

a man who says i have
the power
to change the world

who sees faith
not as a crutch but
a sword

and what we’ve become
is a nation of children
who cannot be saved

when the mother tells
her daughter’s killer that
he deserves no mercy
the face of god should appear
on every empty billboard
in america

the leaders of nations
should be
burned as witches

after this though
what?

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